The Myth of Safety.

So, as has become my habit during nap time, I was listening to a video-cast from Solid Rock. (Really awesome church in Portland. If God ever leads me to Portland, Solid Rock would be at the top of my list of potential home churches.) The sermon was about Jesus walking on the water. It's really a great sermon, and if you want to listen to it, I encourage you to check it out here .

But something really stood out to me that wasn't even exactly a main point, but just a great side note of information. John Mark (the pastor) was talking about living courageously and how it's important for us not to be cowardly. He then mentions a passage of scripture (I think I found the one he was talking about. I forgot the address. If not, I guess I found a different passage that says much the same, and it only adds to the point.) in Revelation 21:7-9. "But as for the cowardly, the faithless, the detestable, as for murderers, the sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars, their portion will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death.” Uh, guys? Did you catch that? Cause I've read this verse several times and never realized this until it was pointed out to me: God equates cowardly and faithless hearts with the usual suspects like murderers who will end up in the lake of fire. 

Just when I think I'm doing okay, and maybe getting the hang of things, reality slaps me, once again. Because that's where I belong. In the same category with them. That's who I am without Christ- a faithless, lying coward. 

Fear. It's been a lifelong struggle (so far, and it shows no signs of letting up) for me. As much as I love new things, adventure and risk, I shy away from those things much more than I wish I did. I don't want to live life with my mantra being "Be careful!" I want my mantra to be "Why not?!" 

As much as risk, adventure and new things can scare the daylights out of me, I have one fear that's bigger: living my life dictated by fear. As distracting as my fears can be, when it comes down to it, my biggest fear actually is the captivity that inevitably comes with fear. What scares me worse than getting physically paralyzed cause I did something stupid and risky is being emotionally paralyzed because I was too scared to do those stupid things. What scares me more than dying is being at the end of my life and realizing I've wasted my life and that I never really actually lived. The regrets that I'd have from a life lived in mental, emotional, personal and physical plastic bubble wrap are much more difficult to deal with than making myself vulnerable. Because, seriously? At the end of the day, I'm terminal anyways. I'm dying, coming closer to Heaven every single day. That should be an exciting thing, not an anxiety-inducing thing. I mean seriously what's the worst that can happen to me in this  life? I die? Not to seem trite, because I know death is very real and stings horribly for those of us left in it's wake. But even if I die, I'm better off!

I want to live life without fear, undaunted, and fully trusting in God's plans. I want to live life with the knowledge that I'm not Home yet. I want to make my actions count. I want to realize that eternity is at stake so I'd better brave up, be willing to take risks to be His hands and feet, and live selflessly. I'm over the myth of safety, and I've gotta make up my mind: do I want to really live or not?